something unbelievable
by i-am-unicornBS
Summary: Falling out of love with Brittany was never an option for Santana but fixing it was definitely something she could do. What better way to do that than to do it front of an audience (4x22- idea from Naya's twitter post and photo)


**Just a little fluff after seeing Naya's twitter update and the photo of Tubs that she posted today. Please review, favourite, etc. I love feedback, whether it be positive or negative, go crazy.**

* * *

When I had first stepped into this room 20 minutes ago, it was like taking a step into the past but also, maybe taking one into the future. Everything is just the way I remember it. The bed covers are the same, the Charlie St Cloud poster is the same, the photos on the walls are the same, the chair in the corner, your desk, the picture frames on available surfaces, Lt is the same. It is all just the way it used to be. Nothing is different.

I smile as I reminisce on all that had taken place within these four walls. All of the memories we had created over the many years of knowing one another seemed to be still evident amongst all the details of your room.

Memories like the small hole in the wall which is now covered by a small photo we'd taken that day just so that we had something to hide the evidence of our 11 year old antics.

Like the small red stain on your carpet which came about when we were 13 and thought we'd sneak a bottle of your parents red wine into your room that night in an attempt to act older and more mature.

Or the crack in the lamp from when I knocked it to the ground when I panicked that your mom would find us in a very compromising position, only to have you wrap your arms around me and remind me that we were alone that night.

But the most fond memory engraved into your room came shortly after the lamp incident. The very bold line carved into the bed post at the bottom of your bed. I remember coming into your room the following day and running my finger along the post only to stop when a deep and broad marking caught my attention. It was freshly made and stood out amongst the others. Against my then, better judgment, I couldn't help but to allow a bashful smile to grace my mouth because that was now my favourite memory. That whole night was magic and that, still, boldest line, continued to prove that you thought the same.

I sat myself down on the edge of your bed as I continued to look around and smile at the space around me. Everything just screamed _Brittany_. My observing stopped instantly though when I looked across at the other bedside table. My smile dropped to something much sadder. I forced myself to look, I made myself try to identify even the slightest of feelings you had felt with me.

The framed picture of you and Sam sat angled towards the bed. You both were smiling, you with a closed mouth and Sam with his enormous guppy mouth stretched up under his eyes. It hurt to see you happy with somebody else –happy within somebody else's arms, but besides that hurt I can still manage to smile. Yes, you look happy but if I'm to be totally honest, you don't look nearly as happy as you did with me. Your eyes weren't shining how they would when you were so happy you could hardly contain yourself. Your smile wasn't stretched to its full size. There was no faint blush shimmered across your cheeks. But most of all, you weren't holding onto Sam like you were afraid he'd disappear any second.

The only thing which did manage to damper my smile once more was the knowledge that our picture used to be there. You once told me that every night when I couldn't be there you would hold that photo to your chest and fall asleep holding it because doing that made you feel close to me. Now I can only image this photo of the two of you held between your arms and chest every night because Sam couldn't stay with you. That saddens me.

But then again I just feel angry, because this is my entire fault. I practically pushed you into the arms of any other wanting person –and let's be honest, who wouldn't want to be given the opportunity to call you theirs? I could feel a warm tingling sensation behind my eyes warning me that there could be an onslaught of tears any second but I forced myself to hold them back –I didn't want your mom coming up here thinking I couldn't handle seeing you again and bringing distress to you when you arrived.

I swallowed the thick lump in my throat and breathed in a somewhat steadying breath. Once the pricking had disappeared I urged myself forward towards your bedside table.

Ever since we were young I'd known of all your hidden compartments stashed around your room where you would keep all of your deepest secrets locked away from the world. So now, as I reached for the bottom draw of the bedside table, I had to hold my breath, praying that we were still so evidently present together amongst your thoughts and your secrets.

In that draw was where you kept your cute pyjamas all neatly folded, but what nobody else realised was that below those pyjamas was a fake bottom to the draw. You had put a thin piece of ply wood in there as a way to keep your things hidden from the naked eye, but unfortunately or fortunately, not hidden from my psychic Mexican third eye.

But it was strange because never have I felt so nervous to lift that piece of wood out of the way. Maybe it was because I wasn't sure of what I'd find or maybe of what I _wouldn't_ find.

But I pulled myself together and finally pried open the compartment and there, just like it has remained for years now, was your stack of diaries that you would write in any time you were given the chance to. I released the breath I was holding and carefully reached and pulled out the top book –your most recent book.

I was scared to open it and for once I felt like I was invading your privacy more than usual. I mean, we used to always share everything with each other, I'd never thought I'd have to basically go behind your back to find out if I remained in your thoughts.

But eventually I found some courage to pry open the cover and skim across the pages. I skipped to the last few entries, not wanting to read too much into her time with Sam and what she has probably undoubtedly written about him within the diary. I looked down at one of the pages, briefly reading over the handwriting there. there wasn't necessarily anything which should worry me, it basically just contained the events of her day, who she spent it with –sadly Sam was one of those people –and what she wished she could have done and what she had planned for the following day.

It was the same for the next few entries but then I reached one which she had written only last week. It was kind of short compared to most of her entries but it still made my heart skip a beat.

_Dear diary,_

_I know you're just a book so you technically don't have feelings but I think I've written enough about my own feelings in you for you to have developed some of your own._

_Today I broke up with Sam. I felt like it was the right thing to do and still believe that._

_I think you already know why I had to do that, you've been keeping note of all my other entries so you must have seen her name amongst the many different entries I've written._

_Sam was sad but then he was kind of angry. He kept on yelling about 'a lesbian not being able to let go of what's not hers' I knew he was talking about Santana and it made me want to cry that he would say such a thing about her. Of course she wouldn't let go of us. But maybe he just needs to understand that I never stopped being hers and that I was never his._

_Diary, I love Santana and I just want her to know that but it's hard to tell her because I know that if she knew she'd be on the next train home and I can't let her do that. She needs to live her life in New York and become something bigger, she needs to be the star I've known she'd always become._

_I love her but sometimes you have to make sacrifices, that sacrifice was telling her to go live her dream even if we both know that her dream involved me and mine involved her. But I always believed that if it's meant to be it will be. It doesn't matter when it happens but it will._

_I love her and she loves me...I hope._

_Over and out,_

_Brittany._

All I could think to say after that was 'Of course I love you' and I did end up saying that, out loud to an empty room, empty sans for Lord Tubbington. But I guess I wasn't very in tuned with what was going on around me because the small inhalation of air followed by a quiet 'You love me?' was all I needed to hear for my back to straighten out and for my hands to lose grip on the book in my hands, letting it fall to the ground with a dull thud.

"San?", I didn't need to be looking at her to know that she was nervous and a little confused about my sudden appearance. I tried to quickly calm my on nerves before I stood and turned to face her by the door.

"Hey", it was so quiet I hardly recognised it as my own voice. I tried to smile across at her but it just turned into a nervous twitch of the lips. "I just wanted –",

"You didn't tell me you were coming to Lima", she was speaking in riddles in terms of her emotions. She sounded happy that I was there, surprised, excited but sad and confused about why she hadn't known this was going to happen.

"I –It was supposed to be a surprise", yes, it was suppose to be a surprise but then again it was a surprise to me too considering I kind of just up and left New York to get to Lima because I had an impulse to see her.

"Well I'm definitely surprised", she smiled bashfully across as me making my cheeks inflame with heat.

"You're home earlier than I thought you'd be",

"I'm always home at this time today, there's no Cheerio's practice", she said with a shrug as if it was something I should have already known –well technically I should have considering I was a Cheerio too all throughout my time at Mckinley.

"Right".

We just stood there for a little while in silence, waiting for the other to make the first move and thankfully it wasn't me who had to do it because I was worried I'd be rejected.

Brittany put her bag down in the corner before taking those few steps towards me to close the gap between us and before I could figure out her next move, she flung her arms around my shoulders and pulled me into her body. It was instinct to wrap my own arms around her waist and to hold her close, my face buried in her neck, inhaling the sweetness that is Brittany.

"I missed you", she whispered into my ear. But it wasn't the whisper which caught my attention, it was the shaky effect in her voice, hinting to me that she was upset and was on the verge of crying.

"I missed you too Britt, you know that", I whispered back too worried that if I spoke in a louder voice our little bubble would evaporate.

Her body began to shake in my hold and then the small hiccups in her throat started. She was crying and it broke my heart to hear her do so.

I pulled back from the hug regretfully. I remained holding onto her waist to let her know that I'd keep her afloat. I searched her tear stained face for an answer to her sudden crys but she wouldn't look at me or was finding it difficult to do so.

"Brittany, why are you crying?", I reached out with one hand to lift her chin so that she was looking straight at me and what I saw made me want to look away. She was so broken on the inside that her pain and suffering was showing on the outside. She looked so conflicted, like she just didn't know what to do.

"I just missed you so much Santana and I –I need you here with me but you probably don't want that, you probably have a much better life in New York, maybe a really pretty and smart girlfriend, somebody better than me", she just continued to talk, her fears providing her mouth the ability to speak up and commute those fears and worries to me. "You probably just want to be friends. Did you come back for closure? Did you need to tell me we can be friends but only friends? Is that why you're here? Cause San, I don't know if I can do that", the tears were coming quicker now and the panic was so clear on her face that I couldn't help but smile and let out an involuntary laugh at her silliness.

"Friends? Are you kidding me Britt? I could never _just_ be friends with you." Surprisingly her face fell even further, maybe she didn't understand what I meant, maybe she feared for the worse –the worse being that I can't be anything with her.

"I'm so stupid", she muttered to herself, "This is my fault", I furrowed my brows, curious as to where she was going with this. "I never should have dated Sam, if I hadn't, we'd probably be together again, but it's all my fault",

"Just shut up Brittany", I laughed again at her surprised face but I didn't indulge in laughing for long.

"Do you want to know what's stupid, or more so, pathetic?", she just continued to gaze at me, her eyes full of question, "What's pathetic is that all this time I've been in New York I've had girls try to make a move on me and every time they tried I had to turn them down",

"Why?", she tried to sound curious, which yes, she is, but I can tell she's also trying to contain her excitement with the fact that I may have turned them down because of her.

"Every one of those girls I had told I already had a girlfriend, every one of those girls believes that that's you. I know it sounds stupid considering the fact that I broke up with you but deep down I know that I can't be with anyone but you. I can't even properly be _me _without you. We're a two shot Britt, that's how it's always been".

She smiled. Not like how she was smiling in the picture with Sam but how she used to smile when she was with me.

"San?", it was breathy and soft which drew me in closer to her.

"Yeah?", I replied similarly.

"I love you", her voice became a little higher at the end, making what she was saying a statement of truth. I smiled back and pulled her back into me.

"I love you too".

I kissed her and everything felt right again. I felt like I was complete and that nothing bad in this world could pull me down. I cherished this moment, the moment which would start the rest of our lives. Sure we'd done the whole high school relationship thing and it wasn't that it didn't work out it was just that we needed some time apart. I'm glad for that time we were separated because it only made it more obvious how much I need her in my life, It made it so much more obvious that this is what I need.

That she was what I need.

And as I pulled away from the kiss, her eyes on me and mine on her, I looked across the room towards her desk and the laptop which sat there, it's webcam fixated on the two of us.

Brittany's homepage for livestreaming 'Fondue for two' sat opened on the screen, her comments section being blown up and her likes button being put to full use.

"I never should have said 'I can't' that day you wanted me to be on your show. I'm sorry I ever did that, I was scared but I know that no matter what happened you would have been there for me, I just didn't realise it at the time. But what I do know and have known for so very long is that I love you and I want to be with you for as long as you'll have me, so –",

Suddenly her eyes grew wide and her mouth fell open. I wasn't sure if she was worried about what she thought I was going to say or just surprised.

"San, are you proposing, cause you know I'm going to say yes, right?", she gripped my hands so tightly that they were beginning to hurt but I didn't pay any mind to it. But what I did pay vital attention to was the fact that she said, she'd accept my proposal, I should definitely keep that in mind for when that moment does arise.

"No I'm not, but I am telling you that I want you back. I was stupid to let you go to begin with, But Brittany, this time away from you has been one of –no –_the_ most painful experience of my life. I need you like I need to breathe. Please, with you be my girlfriend?", she never verbally answered but I was fine with that considering in the next second she had thrown herself into my arms and crashed her lips against my own.

"I take that as a yes?", I asked in between ferocious kissed, she just nodded her head and continued to assault my lips, but I was okay with that. It didn't take long for the kisses to slow down and to become something much sweeter. We stood there holding each other and tasting the love literally poured into each other's mouths. It became something a lot more private, something for behind closed doors.

"Britt, I think we should turn that off first", I said, gesturing to the still very live camera recoding every hot second.

"What?", she followed the direction I was pointing in and gasped in shock at only just noticing the setup. "You –You put this on the internet?", she wasn't mad, no, she was so happy.

"Yeah, I hope that okay"

"Okay? San I've been trying to get you to do this for so long, of course it's okay", and with that she took one last look towards the laptop, smiled and gave a little wave before shutting it down.

"Now, where were we?", she strutted towards me until I was backed up against her bed, causing me to eventually fall flat on my back against the mattress.

"I believe we were about to go about our sweet lady kisses",

"Mhmm".

Kissing Brittany was like heaven. Being with Brittany was something greater. But having Brittany to call my own was something unbelievable.


End file.
